Well, I drank enough to sustain a small Spanish village, I haven't had an orgasm in a thousand years, and I will probably die old and alone in a beautifully designed apartment with all of Clive's illegitimate children swarming around me... How do you think I feel?
Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.
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Drew Carey
Be wary of strong drink, it can make you shoot at the tax collector...and miss.
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Robert A. Heinlein
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.
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Benjamin Franklin
I like to have a martini, Two at the very most. After three I'm under the table, after four I'm under my host.
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Dorothy Parker
Writer's block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.
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Steve Martin
More Quotes By Alice Clayton
Always take a compliment, Caroline. Always take it for the way it was intended. You girls are always so quick to twist what others say. Simply say thank you and move on.
I don’t care how old you are, or what background you come from, there are two universal truths. We will always laugh at…gas if it happens at the wrong time, and we are always curious about what goes on in other people’s bedrooms.
My boyfriend likes to fuck my brains out on our kitchen island. Which tile would you recommend for that?
Hey, if you're going to say what I think you're going to say…wait, are you going to say it?” he asked, smiling down at me.“ Yes, yes I think so.” I grinned shyly back.“ Well, then I think we should say it at the same...
He was everything I’d ever wanted, and everything I hadn’t even known I needed.
